Malo razonode sa toalet papirom

 

Last Supper

Q: Why was there only bread and wine at The Last Supper?

A: It was a potluck and only men were invited.

Making comparisons

In Heaven:
The cooks are French,
The policemen are English,
The mechanics are German,
The lovers are Italian,
The bankers are Swiss.

In Hell:
The cooks are English,
The policemen are German,
The mechanics are French,
The lovers are Swiss,
The bankers are Italian.

~ ~ ~

In Computer Heaven:
The management is from Intel,
The design and construction is done by Apple,
The marketing is done by Microsoft,
IBM provides the support,
Gateway determines the pricing.

In Computer Hell:
The management is from Apple,
Microsoft does design and construction,
IBM handles the marketing,
The support is from Gateway,
Intel sets the price.

The Obedient Wife

There was a man who had worked all his life, had saved all of his money, and was a real miser when it came to his money.


Just before he died, he said to his wife...'When I die, I want you to take all my money and put it in the casket with me. I want to take my money to the afterlife with me.'

And so he got his wife to promise him, with all of her heart, that when he died, she would put all of the money into the casket with him.

Well, he died He was stretched out in the casket, his wife was sitting there - dressed in black, and her friend was sitting next to her.. When they finished the ceremony, and just before the undertakers got ready to close the casket, the wife said,

'Wait just a moment!'

She had a small metal box with her; she came over with the box and put it in the casket. Then the undertakers locked the casket down and they rolled it away. So her friend said,

'Girl, I know you were not foolish enough to put all that money in there with your husband.'

The loyal wife replied, 'Listen, I'm a Christian; I cannot go back on my word. I promised him that I was going to put that money into the casket with him'

You mean to tell me you put that mone y in the casket with him!?!?!?'

'I sure did,' said the wife. 'I got it all together, put it into my account, and wrote him a check.... If he can cash it, then he can spend it.'

Canadian Post Office job

Harry Peters went to the Canadian Post Office to interview for a job.

The interviewer asked him, "Are you a veteran?"

"Yes, I served two tours in Vietnam."

"Good, that counts in your favor. Do you have any service related
disabilities?"

"I am 100% disabled. A mortar round blew off my testicles so they
declared me disabled, it doesn't affect my ability to work, though."

"Sorry to hear about the damage, but I have some good news for you, I
can hire you right now! Our working hours are 8am to 4pm. Come on in
about 10am, and we'll get you started."

"If working hours are from 8am to 4pm, why do you want me to come at
10am?"

"Well, this is a government organization. We don't do anything but sit
around and scratch our balls for the first two hours. No point of your coming in for that.

Pospanci