Pitanja i odgovori iz srpskih kvizova:

1. 
   P: Odakle je fudbalski klub Selta?
   
   O: Iz Viga.
   
   - Ne, iz Španije. ("Slagalica", januar 2005.)
   
   
   
   P: Kako se zovete?
   O: Jašim.
   - Izvolite Jašime.
   - Ništa, samo sam to hteo da čujem. Doviđenja. ("Zlatna ?ica", decembar
   2004.)
   
   
   
   P: Iz kod jezika potiče reč šator?
   O: Iz ciganskog.
   - Iz romskog, žao mi je. ("Slagalica", novembra 2004.)
   
   
   
   P: Kako se zove najmanja ptica na svetu?
   
   O: Mali beloglavi sup.
   
   
   
   P: Koja evropska zemlja je poznata po polki i polonezi?
   
   O: Polinezija.
   
   
   
   P. U koju grupu životinja spadaju kenguri?
   
   O. U skakavce.
   
   
   
   P: Ako je ćirilica drugo slovensko pismo, koje je prvo?
   
   O: A!
   
   
   
   P: Kako se naziva memorijska jedinica od 1,4 Mb?
   
   O: Štednjak, šporet.
   
   
   
   P: U kojoj zemlji su ljudi pravno i formalno u najgorem položaju?
   
   O: U Talibanu.
   
   (*ovaj odgovor je priznat kao tačan).
   
   
   
   P: Na koji grad gleda "Soba s pogledom"?
   
   O: Na more!
   
   
   
   P: Kako se zove najveći okean na svetu?
   
   O: Tihi okean.
   
   - Odgovor nije tačan. Pacifik!
   
   
   
   P: Ako mačka spada u porodicu mačaka, u koju porodicu spada vuk?
   
   O: U Karadžiće.
   
   
   
   P: Koji grad u našoj zemlji i dalje nosi ime po jednom komunističkom
   funkcioneru?
   
   O: Jajce
   
   
    

Uh, malo sam se zaletio....

  

Sretan put na more!

  

Oba su pala

  

Oooopppsssss again!

  

Ooooopppsssssss.............

  

Pope and the Seven Dwarfs

The Seven Dwarfs go to the Vatican, and because they are
"The Seven Dwarfs" they get ushered into see the Pope.

Dopey leads the pack.

"Dopey my son," says the Pope, "what can I do for you?"

Dopey asks, "Excuse me, Your Excellency, but are there any
dwarf nuns in Rome?"

The Pope wrinkles his brow at the odd question, thinks for a
moment and answers, No Dopey, there are no dwarf nuns in Rome."

In the background a few of the dwarfs begin giggling.

Dopey turns around and gives them a glare, silencing them.
Dopey turns back to face the Pope.

"Your Worship, are there any dwarf nuns in all of Europe?"

The Pope, puzzled again, thinks for a moment and then
answers, "No Dopey, there are no dwarf nuns in all of Europe."

This time all the other dwarfs burst into laughter.

Once again, Dopey turns around and silences them all with an angry
glare.

Dopey turns back to the Pope and says, "Mr. Pope, are there
ANY dwarf nuns in the whole world?"

The Pope answers, "I'm sorry, my son, there are no dwarf nuns
anywhere in the world."

The other dwarfs collapse into a heap, rolling, and laughing,
pounding on the floor, tears rolling down their cheeks as
they begin chanting:

"Dopey screwed a penguin!"

"Dopey screwed a penguin!

Top 16 Rejected Motel 6 Slogans!

16. We're working on that smell thing, too.



15. Because you deserve better than the backseat of some car.



14. As seen on "COPS"



13. If We'd Known You Were Staying All Night, We'd Have Changed the Sheets



12. Not just for nooners anymore.



11. We left off the 9, but you know it's there.



10. You rented the room, now buy the video.



9. Sure, you could stay someplace nicer, but then you wouldn't have money left over for a hooker.



8. We'll leave the Lysol for ya!



7. Hey, we're not the Ritz, but just try bringing your secretary there on *your* salary, pal!



6. We don't make the adultery. We make the adultery *better*



5. It's Hookerriffic!



4. Official Lodging of the 1998 Florida Marlins



3. Blurring the line between stains and avant garde sheet art since 1962!



2. Cheap and Easy -- Just Like Your Mother



and the Number 1 Rejected Motel 6 Slogan...



1. We put the "Ho" in "Motel"

 

Dobar naziv za supermarket

  

Hooray Australia

Subject:

I wish the leaders of our country would take a stand like Australia

Muslims who want to live under Islamic Sharia law were told on Wednesday to get out of Australia, as the government targeted radicals in a bid to head off potential terror attacks.
A day after a group of mainstream Muslim leaders pledged loyalty to Australia at a special meeting with Prime Minister John Howard, he and his ministers made it clear that extremists would face a crackdown.
Treasurer Peter Costello, seen as heir
apparent to Howard, hinted that some radical clerics could be asked to leave the country if they did not accept that Australia was a secular state and its laws were made by parliament."If those are not your values, if you want a country which has Sharia law or a theocratic state, then Australia is not for you," he said onnationaltelevision."I'd be saying to clerics who are teaching that there are two laws governing people in Australia, one the Australian law and another the Islamic law, that is false. If you can't agree with parliamentary law, independent courts, democracy, and would prefer Sharia law and have the opportunity to go to another country, which practices it, perhaps, then, that's a better option," Costello said.
Asked whether he meant radical
clerics would be forced to leave, he said those with dual citizenship could possibly be asked to move to the other country.Education Minister Brendan Nelson later told reporters that Muslims who did not want to accept local values should "clear off".
"Basically, people who don't want to be Australians, and they don't want to live by Australian values and understand them, well then they can basically clear off," he said. Separately, Howard angered some Australian Muslims on Wednesday by saying he supported spy agencies monitoring the nation's mosques.
AMERICA
Quote:
IMMIGRANTS, NOT AUSTRALIANS, MUST ADAPT. Take It Or Leave It I am tired of this nation worrying about whether we are offending some
individual or their culture. Since the terrorist attacks on Bali, we have experienced a surge in patriotism by the majority of Australians.

However, the dust from the attacks had barely settled when the "politically correct" crowd began complaining about the possibility that our patriotism was offending others. I am not against immigration, nor do I hold a grudge against anyone who is seeking a better life by coming to Australia.

However, there are a few things that those who have recently come to our country, and apparently some born here, need to understand.

This idea of Australia being a multicultural community has served only to dilute our sovereignty and our national identity. As Australians, we have our own culture, our own society, our own language and our own lifestyle.

This culture has been developed over two centuries
of struggles, trials and victories by millions of men and women who have sought freedom. We speak mainly ENGLISH, not Spanish, Lebanese, Arabic, Chinese, Japanese, Russian, or any other language. Therefore, if you wish to become part of our society, Learn the language!

Most Australians believe in God. This is not some Christian, right wing, political push but a fact because Christian men and women, on Christian principles, founded this nation, and this is clearly documented. It is certainly appropriate to display it on the walls of our schools. If God offends you, then I suggest you consider another part of the world as your new home, Because God is part of our culture.

We will accept your beliefs and will not question why, all we ask is that you accept ours and live in harmony and peaceful enjoyment with us.

If the Southern Cross
offends you, or you don't like " A Fair Go", then you should seriously consider a move to another part of this planet.

We are happy with our culture and have no desire to change, and we really don't care how you did things where you came from. By all means keep your culture but do not force it on others.

This is OUR COUNTRY, OUR LAND, and OUR LIFESTYLE, and we will allow you every opportunity to enjoy all this.
But once you are done complaining, whining, and griping about Our Flag, Our Pledge, Our Christian beliefs, or Our Way of Life, I highly encourage you take advantage of one other great Australian freedom, "THE RIGHT TO LEAVE".

If you aren't happy here then LEAVE. We didn't force you to come here. You asked to be here. So accept the country YOU accepted.

Pretty easy really, when you think about it. I figure if we all
keep passing this to our friends (and enemies) it will also, sooner or later get back to the complainers. Let's all try, please.


PLEASE PASS THIS ON TO EVERYONE, PERHAPS WE CAN CREATE A GROUND SWELL AND SEND OUR U.S.POLITICIANS THE MESSAGE THAT THE VAST MAJORITY OF US BELIEVE AS THE AUSSIES DO.........

Pismo iz Kanade

 Dragi naši,

Ne možemo još da konfirmamo naš dolazak ovog ljeta, ali, kako sada
stvari stoje, izgleda da ćemo morati da kanselujemo tikete koje smo bukirali, jer nas
ubi morgidž za taun haus što smo skoro kupili. Doduše, za tikete imamo, ali
ne možemo da skupimo za prezente svima vama i ostaloj familiji, a bez toga
ne ide da dolazimo jer nećemo da nas smatraju za neke bamove, kao što su
pričali za Đoleta i njegove kad su svojima doneli po 100 dolara, kako su čip i
kako ništa nisu uradili u Kanadi. Mi tako nećemo.

Ili dolazimo kao gospoda ili nikako. Zato smo se i dogovorili da
sejvujemo što možemo više i da sve odložimo za sledeći vakejšn.

Inače, mi živimo dosta dobro. Ja radim ful tajm i još dva part tajma, a
Zorica je našla i treći part tajm preko vikenda, ali smo dobro uskladili šihte
pa možemo da se vidjamo svakog drugog vika. Možda je to malo nezgodno za
Rebeku, ali njoj plaćamo dej ker posle škole, a odatle je uzima bejbi siterka i
dovodi kući na spavanje. Ona, iako je mala, razume da mi ovoliko radimo za
njeno dobro i da ovako mora da bude sve dok ne otplatimo morgidž. Svaki fri tajm
koristimo da budemo sa njom, pa smo je tako last samer (ili to beše pretprošlog leta)
vodili ceo dan na lejk. Kupili smo joj i hot dog i ajs krim i od tada stalno svima
priča kako joj je bilo bjutiful.
Ja imam dosta posla oko taun hausa katujem travu, čistim atik i
nekako ugrabim par sati dnevno da sređujem bejsment jer hoćemo da ga
rentamo i tako povećamo inkam.

Kao što vidite, da je lako - nije, ali kad je čovek hard vorker i ako
dobro isplanira skedžual može sve da uradi. Ja sam lepo doterao liniju na 130
paunda, pa mi se neki naši dušmani odavde podsmevaju da sam se osušio zato što
mnogo radim i spavam samo četiri sata, ali to je samo zato što oni mnogo
dželos na mene, a i ne znaju da ja uvek ugrabim bar 45 minuta da dremnem u
sabveju. Čoveku više i ne treba, a i to je samo privremeno 25-30 godina, dok ne
otplatimo morgidž a posle ćemo da uživamo. Sve je lako kad imaš svoj
target.

Čuo sam da Djole i ove godine ide za stari kraj. Može se njemu kad već
deset godina čući na velferu i jos vozi picu za keš, a žena mu otvorila bjuti
salon u stanu pa ove naše guske navalile ko nezdrave da rade her kat.
Ali, sta im vredi kad ne znaju da invest nego sve spiskaju na putovanja i neke druge
stjupid stvari. Zato će ceo život da budu golje i da rentaju apartment, a mi
imamo properti i sejving akaunt u banki. On stalno mejk fan od mene i priča
okolo kako sam ful i ne znam da živim, ali polako, zaigraće mečka i pred
njegovim apartmentom koji renta. Ja sam već obavestio revenju Kanada o njegovim
biznisima, pa ću da ga pitam kako se živi kad bude počeo da plaća taksu
za sve ove godine.

A to što on misli kako mi ne znamo da živimo, malo se prevario. Skoro
svaki satrdej uveče ja i Zorica popijemo kejs piva onaj mali od siks. Doduše,
ona popije samo jedno zato što mora na najt posao od devet, ali se zato ja
rileks i smažem sve ostalo jer u sandej radim tek od osam ujutro.
Zato, kad ga vidite nemojte ništa da mu verujete šta priča jer on nije čovek za rispekt.
To je rizon što vam nisam poslao pare po njemu, jer znam kako će da kaže da
sam čip i da grabim samo za sebe. Vi znate da to nije zbog toga, nego zato sto
sam temporari šort, ali i to je samo dok ne otplatimo morgidž. Posle ćemo
svi da uživamo.
 

Crazy Frog

 

Crazy Frog